Dad sent me the story below in an email and I thought it was too cute:
In the Holy Land A man, his wife, and his mother-in-law went on vacation to the Holy Land. While they were there, the mother-in-law passed away. The undertaker told them, "You can have her shipped home for $5,000, or you can bury her here in the Holy Land for $150.00." The man thought about it and told him he would just have her shipped home. The undertaker asked, "Why would you spend $5,000 to ship your mother-in-law home, when it would be wonderful to be buried here and spend only $150.00?"The man replied, "A man died here 2000 years ago, was buried here, and three days later he rose from the dead. I just can't take that chance."
It started out so good – I took a shower and had some time to myself. On my way to work, I realized I forgot to send milk for Scott. Even though I was over my minutes and it was costing me 40 cents a minute to talk, I decided to give mom a quick call. She of course said not to worry that she had to run some errands so she would just stop at our house and pick some up. I was mortified! My house was a pig sty. I’m serious. I had carried in all my outside plants and they were all over the place – living room floor, staircase, dinning table, counters. The lovely asian beetles that snuck in on the plants were now laying dead on the ground surrounding all the plants. Scott’s dirty, spit-up on clothes and bibs were still in the floor along with Ryan’s chocolate mug, my water bottle and other crap. I had done the dishes but not ALL of them b/c my strainer got full and I was too lazy to dry them (no auto dishwasher at my house). Needless to say I didn’t want mom in my house so I warned her to close her eyes when she went in so she didn’t see the mess. She started in about it like any mother would, and I interrupted with “I’m over on my minutes, I gotta go!” She continued so I said it again, said bye and hung up. Ouch! I don’t talk to my mom like that, nor does she deserve that. Several hours later, I called her to apologize and asked her to come down for lunch. So I skipped my morning pumping and waited till noon and nursed Scott during lunch. Then when I went for my 2pm pumping, I realized I didn’t have the pump portion that I so desperately needed. As I got the stuff out to pump, I was so frustrated, my eyes were about to water and I thought to myself “I could go downstairs and cry the whole time I pump, it would be good to just get it out”. Then I didn’t have my pump = added frustration. A quick call to my buddy Jen, who also has a medela pump, to ask if I could borrow the pump portion. Drove to her house which took twice as long because of road construction (more frustration) and then her pump was a different model and wouldn’t work. I shared some of my frustrations with her and headed back to the office. By now, I have almost 6 hours worth of milk in my nini’s (since I didn’t do my morning pump) and needed to pump. I walked in the office, finished up something and left at 3:30.
I got home yesterday without crying. Ryan came home and I had laundry going, a fire started and dinner on the stove. He of course was shocked. I warned him up front that I was frustrated with just about everybody and everything. He asked what he did wrong and I said you're not on my list at the moment. I got supper cooked, the kitchen cleaned, my kid was taking a nap and things were going well. I told ryan that we needed to work on our communication and he thought that was going great. Ha! We aren’t and so we discussed that briefly. Then I was cleaning living room #2 and picked up a gallon jug of insecticide off mom & ralph's italian leather couches that are at our house. I assumed the bottle was empty since it was so carelessly lying on the couch. It wasn’t and it had leaked all over the one cushion and down the side. I was so ticked and immediately started in on Ryan for being so careless. I started cleaning up the mess while he said he'd do it. But ryan is never in a hurry and I wanted it taken care of right then. I was scared that it wouldn't come out and my parents would have ruined couches. He wasn't concerned because the stuff is water soluble. I scrubbed and scrubbed, took the cushions out and scrubbed some more. I hope the leather is okay. Grr, I was so ticked. But the rest of the evening went okay. Scott was fussy which makes ryan fussy. He does fine when scott is happy but he can't calm scott down quite like me and gets irritated with the crying. Things went a little better last night, I got a good night of sleep and my throat isn't bothering me as bad this morning. I could so use a vacation – at least 10 hours a week :)
This morning, already
It started out great. I fed scott in bed and then got to snuggle with my honey for a while. scott pee'd through his diaper and ryan was bathing him so I decided to make breakfast (usually ryan makes me breakfast every morning). We didn't have milk to make the eggs fluffy but I managed. Served my honey breakfast, fixed his hot chocolate, did the dishes from supper last night and breakfast, stuffed my face, grabbed my wedding band, fed the dogs and jumped in the car. It was going great, I didn't have anything on my face but I was on time. Yipee!
Then I get to work and I'm not there more than an hour when things get irritating again. Why is it that a person thinks she needs to share all the details of local gossip with me. Let me just preface all this by saying that the 5 minute talk I hear every morning is talking about gossip this week. As soon as it was over, the dj started talking about an accident and the road conditions. someone called in and she asked if anyone was hurt, like she wanted the dirt. I was so tempted to call her (and I would have if I weren't over on my minutes) to ask if she listened to the talk on gossip. So, anyway, this person proceeds to tell me the local gossip and each time I stop her and say I don't want to hear it. I'm not kidding you, she keeps on and tells me 3 different stories. One of which was totally the wrong info that she was sharing with people. So, I even confronted her about it and said "that's why we shouldn't gossip". She continued. Holy cow, did she not get the hints? I don't want to hear it! I shared with her about the gossip talk I've heard this week and how I don't want to hear those things about people. It just ticks me off, she's so sneaky and quiet about it, duh, because she shouldn't be opening her mouth! Ah, gotta love everyone though, Jesus said to do so.
One more random thought:
Ryan and I watched napolean dynamite on Sunday. it was the biggest waste of my time ever. it was a stupid-and-not-even-that-funny movie. i should have listened to michelle, i do want my two hours back! But today I'm wearing my shirt that says "vote for pedro" only the pedro is crossed off and it says "Jesus" instead. If anyone questions it today, I'm gonna entertain myself and say "are you racist against mexicans, it's jesus" as in "hey-suess" the mexican name. Okay, gotta get to working, its almost 8 am