Living Life

Such emotions lately.  Naughty kids are rough to parent.  Yes, I may be dealing with kid issues, but there have been those moments that are fresh in my mind a week later.  I am so thankful to be living in the moment.  Some moments are sweet victories simply because I have felt like I'm failing as a parent.  We try to teach our kids hard work, selfless-ness, and some of those things.  Even so, our kids seem greedy, all about "things", self-centered, and think they deserve EVERYTHING.  I'm not trying to have a pity party about my parenting.  I'm also well aware that we're not perfect examples.  But 11 days in a poor country kind of changes your perspective.  Even if it's your 4th trip there.  Ethiopia reminded me of that perspective many times.

We all know how those issues reveal themselves in kids' attitudes and our responses so there's no need for detail here.  What I really wanted to share are the small victories that occurred today.

If you know us, you probably don't see the attachment struggles between Judah and me.  If you know us real well, you've heard about or seen them.  This past week has been good.  And fun.  And I get smiles from Judah on a regular basis, not just blank stares.  Tonight he came around the corner and when we made eye contact, he smiled and my heart warmed.  I'll take that again son!

This morning Scott was discontent about something.  About everything actually.  My reaction was frustration.    When I left in a hurry this morning, he ran to me and hugged me tight.  As we started our seperate ways, he stepped back, looked at me, and hugged me again.  My sweet boy.  He is so considerate of others but tires of being the oldest child who the others follow around.

This afternoon, Bethany asked me more than once if I would just sit with her.  We did that multiple times.  I snuggled her close, she giggled and we both breathed in the moments.  She may have not been feeling good but even so, it was a moment to remember.  She won't always ask me to hug and hold her.

While I love these moments and think they're healthy and necessary, I'm not naive enough to think it will be the fix to the heart issues that have been revealing themselves in the kids and myself.  This week our small group families will be starting to go through the book, Shepherding a Child's Heart by Paul David Tripp.  I'm eagerly awaiting this study and think that deep down my kids are too!