04 November 2012

Quiet Here

Throughout the day I think of nice, fun things to share about.  But I don't live a life where everything's fun and beautiful.  In fact, I don't live a life where grace is not needed every minute of the day it seems like.  So, how do I write without complaining?  How do I share the mundane things that really aren't mundane at all?  Now that my kids are in bed and my house is quiet, I've scanned the recent facebook posts and pinterest updates.  Let me give it to you straight... at least how I see it.

It's been a LONG 13 weeks.  No, we're not pregnant and hiding it.  Shoot, that's not even possible.  Since I'm not living in the perfect world, you might as well know that I already look like I'm 4 months pregnant because I like to eat candy!  It's been a long 13 weeks because I've had this mysterious itching that WONT GO AWAY.  Initial thoughts were an allergic reaction to a new med.  Three weeks after being off that and a growing rash, having tried the daily allergy pill and nightly benadryl, they finally noticed that the fine rash was more than that.  There's also some funky patches that are raw looking.  A depo-medrol (I'm not a doc, so it's not spelled right I'm sure) was guaranteed to take away the itch in 24 to 48 hours.  One week later, I felt what might have been a hint of relief.  Two weeks after that, and one week short of how long this miracle shot was supposed to last, I itched like fire.  Again.  Now, we're onto some other drug.  Side affects = drowsiness.  I slept 12 hours last night.  Partly from the drugs and partly from fighting off a cold.  I napped a few hours this afternoon too.  The itching, well it thinks it's my best friend.  Only it's a nightmare.  My knuckles are raw and it hurts to wash my hands and shower, let alone do dishes.  The rash now now grown onto my elbows so they itch like fire too.  There seems to be no relief except when I sleep.  Imagine my attitude.  Imagine my poor family.  Hence, the need for grace every minute.  It's not because my kids are horrible, it's because my attitude, even though I'm trying to be nice, is rotten.  I have an appointment with a dermatologist in late November.  It was the earliest they could get me in - a total of 8 weeks wait.  It's ridiculous.  I need to get this figured out!

Because of the above situation, everything else seems to be a little on edge.  But, I'm trying.  Itching is exhausting though.  So, I sit here and think...
  • Today is Orphan Sunday.  I wish my church was involved with that.  I tried to encourage that a few times, it didn't capture anyone's interest.  It's hard not to want to judge.
  • Our church is doing some neat things.  Today Pastor gave an interesting sermon on stewardship.  Not directly related to money.  This time. 
  • I wrote a blog asking someone to sponsor one of my little friends in Shanto, Ethiopia.  The post I shared yesterday was successful and now sweet Megan is sponsoring Hana.
  • I was listening to Christmas music today even though I'm usually 100% against Christmas music before Thanksgiving is over.
  • My house is a pit... maybe a result of my massive sleeping lately.
  • My back thinks it needs to put it's burden on my body and so I'll be going to see the Chiropractor tomorrow.  Maybe a massage would help too... a girl can dream.
  • I've consumed lots of unhealthy foods lately, right on the heels of eating so well for a few weeks.
  • I'm learning from the book I'm reading called War on Words.  I need to learn faster! And more!  I have two chapters to read for Tuesday morning and haven't even started them yet.  Guess I'll go do that...

2 comments:

The Ferreiras said...

I itched like a fiend until my legs bled, they kept assuming it was a side affect of pregnancy. After my son was born and the itching continued I pursued another dr, and was diagnosed with hodgkins lymphoma. I know how exhausting and overwhelming constant itching is :( hang in there.

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