Working Mom

For a while now I've thought about this whole working mom issue. I continue to struggle in my own head with all the benefits of both. And then I listen to family related podcasts and it only makes me have more doubt. People who stay at home with their children don't understand the working mom issues. Working mom's don't understand stay at home mom issues. Its not just a matter of 'the grass is greener on the other side'. Its an issue of watching my kids grow up. Of being at home to greet my husband when he comes home from work. Of having energy and time to give to my kids when all they want is to read a book or wrestle on the floor. Of being there when they reach different milestones in their young lives. But on the other hand, I have a good job. Good benefits. Decent pay. Flexibility. An understanding boss. And lately the question has become "do I truly enjoy my job?" I think I do. I love to do things I do at work when I randomly meet a landowner at a golf course. But is it simply my attitude? Who of us likes to do something when we have to do it? Why am I not motivated right now? Is it the weather? Will it ever warm up?

I'm gone from the house about 11 hours a day. Usually 45 minutes of that is spent at my mom's feeding Bethany and chatting with them. By time I get home, I don't have time to cook a meal, clean up, play with the kids, clean up after them, bathe the kids, get them in bed, do laundry or anything else that comes up. Thankfully I have a husband who does most of the cooking, plays with the kids, helps with bath time and I'm not left with doing everything by myself. But then throw into the mix that Wednesday and Thursday nights we're committed to outside activities. So what, that's only two days a week, right. Still, it seems never ending sometimes. Funny thing is that when we slow down, we feel like we don't know what to do with ourselves.

Which brings up another thought. One of my buddies commented on how well I do taking time out to spend with just Ryan. I don't think that we do well at that. Honestly, if we make time to talk, then we're asking Scott to be quiet while we talk. If we wait till the kids go to bed, we do a quick run down of our day, ask for prayer requests, pray together and fall asleep. So, put the kids to bed earlier, right? Remember, I don't get home till 630 and I need some time in there to spend with them.

okay, sorry for the rant... I'm tired and grumpy today.

PS, thank you Ryan for staying up last night and paying bills and working on our budget while I crashed!

Weekend

Another wild weekend for us. Only this was prefaced with two quiet days so I really enjoyed my weekend. My house was already clean (and kept that way for a week straight which is a miracle) so I was able to piddle around with other odds and ends in the morning. I spent the afternoon at the church decorating with some of our international stuff for our "missions Sunday" which went over really well.

Left there and headed home to make a meal for our friends who are new parents. Thanks to my husband who started a meal for me while I was at the church. We finished it up and headed over to their house and I held the baby while they ate. He was so little.

Sunday we had a few old and new friends over for lunch after church. We were hungry but the meal seemed to fill everyone up. We followed that with a game of Mexican Dominoe Train which was fun and as we finished that, Ryan served us all chocolate peanut butter milk shakes which were over the top. Later that afternoon, with an over tired child who needed another hour to his nap, Mom came over with a present for Scott. He was pretty excited about the kite she bought him and said "grammy, thank you for the kite. I just love it so much". Yes, he's good with words that little schmoozer. So, we flew the kite for a while and then went in for some hot chocolate. Scott went home with Grammy and Ryan and hung out and played with Bethany for the evening. It was a nice, quiet night at home!

Trip to Galena

Life is typical for me... super busy. However, I spent a few days last week atthe Eagle Ridge Golf Resort in Galena, IL. It was a good time to hang out with my hubby on someone elses dime. A few thoughts from that trip:

1. When you leave the breastfed baby at home, you MUST take your pump with you.



2. When you forget your pump, you MUST go buy a new one.



3. When you buy a new one, you MUST go outside of your budget.



4. When I forget my pump, have to buy a new one and go outside of my budget, I am not a happy camper.

With that said, I have a rock star husband who drove back to town to make the purchase while I showered and got ready for lunch. What guy do you know would make that purchase? Yes, reason 4 million that I love him!

It was a quick and quiet few days. I mostly played on the internet and listened to my ipod while Ryan was in class. We had a fancy meal Thursday night and sat with two other couples that were fun to chat with. Friday we ventured through Galena but it was cold and we didn't stick around long. We headed home to see our little ones instead which was a lot of fun.

What a Day!

I'm pasting an excerpt of an email to my friend Cori. After she made mention of her day, I thought I'd share a little of mine:

if you're having a rough day, just be glad that you weren't in the bathroom pumping, not at all paying attention, but rather, reading the book the land that was everything when all of a sudden, I felt wetness on my leg. Immediately, I moved the bottle to the side then looked down to see the damage. Only two drops of home brewed milk on my slacks. But it continued to spew over as I quickly unplugged one of the lines (think dairy cow milking set up) but there was still a little suction to the full bottle. There was a tiny little puddle of stuff (which seemed huge at the time) on the floor when I got it stopped. Bummer, I didn't get through the epilogue before the drama. Got it all cleaned up and went to put the milk in the fridge. Helped Sheri clean out the fridge quick as it smelled like something nasty. While doing that, my boss hunted me down because we needed to leave for a meeting. Yeah, that was after I already got "the look" earlier for chatting with Connie. The good part, the drops weren't obvious when I walked into my meeting!

He's Too Good with Words

Scott had several funny moments last night. I'll try to recap them real quick:
1. When B informed him that C was coming over, he started doing circles while hopping in the air and very excitedly hollering "C is coming over. Oh, I love her. I just love C". It was stinkin' adorable.
2. Later while C read Scott his bed time story, there were comments back and forth about Scott stealing B's woman. B looked seriously at Scott and said "She's my woman". And Scott looked right at B and said "no, she's my woman, B". We about died of laughter and Ben got up from where he was sitting with Scott and C and came over and sat by me.

Yes, not even 3 years old and already knows how to schmooze the ladies.

Treasure Hunt Revisited

Do you remember my post about the Iowa Treasure Hunt [march 10th]? I mentioned in that post that Ryan's cousin had $28.86 in unclaimed money. I emailed her about it that day. Yesterday she emailed me back with an interesting reply:

[tam4buit], You'll be happy to know that I checked out the Iowa Treasure Hunt site my 28.86 is actually almost $2,000 of a mutual fund that I had forgotten I had. Thanks for the information this will help with our retirement. It is getting rolled into my 401K. [ryan's cousin]

How 'bout that? Maybe you are rich. Go check out the Iowa Treasure Hunt to see if you have some money out there...

Fly

There were two flies trying to attack the light bulb on our ceiling fan last night. It was annoying to hear them. But more than that, those little pests were knocking all the dust off the fan and it was dusting down on me as I tried to read. Dangit pests, I know I need to dust up there but you don't have to remind me.

One of the flies landed (probably couldn't breathe from dust inhalation) on my blanket and I gave him a good flick. Not more than 20 seconds later, the little bugger flew right into my hair. I'm not kidding. It was like he was in attack mode. I'm serious. I flailed around like a wild woman trying to get the fly out of my hair while Ryan laughed and laughed at me.

Now, who says living in the sticks can't be fun!

PS

Happy early Birthday my dear Ryan.

love,
me

ps: I love you

________
Yes, I finished the book and was surprised by the ending. Definitely a good read! Thanks girls for sharing with me. Now, I'm waiting for her to write a sequel.

Babbling Bethany

My sweet little thing is totally expanding her vocabulary. Not that she really says any purposeful words except "dada", but she's babbling a lot more this past week. We've heard her mock several words in the last few days. She's so cute!

Aren't they adorable?!?!?! If you pay close attention, you'll notice that Scott is laying in Bethany's lap. I'm glad my kids like each other... so far!

merritt

I love reading your comments but hate that I don't have your email to write you back. Girlfriend, I need your email address.

PS: I Love You

Cori recently needed a new book to read. I had nothing to suggest as the reading I do wouldn't interest Cori. I left the suggestions up to others who read lots more. A dear friend, Renae, sent Cori a copy of the book PS I love you. Their conversations really had me curious about the book. And let me just point out for the record that I don't do a ton of reading. I prioritize my time other places. And if there's a movie version, you can bet that I'll watch the movie instead (duh, 90 minutes of my time versus how long to read a book???) However, it sounded so sweet and lured me right in. Cori, upon finishing the book dropped it in the mail to me.

I got it Monday night. I opened the package to find the book wasn't an 80 page read, its a novel. Remember, I don't have much time to read, my life is full of other things. Holy cow, when am I going to get this read? However, somehow I've managed to read through 130-some pages already. Yeah, with a busy last two days, I'm not sure how that happened. Well, maybe it was that I put my kids to bed at a decent time and stayed up to read for a while, I read instead of listening to my ipod while I pumped at work and today I plan on reading during my lunch. Hmm, funny how things can grab your attention so well.

I've had a few books that have pulled me right in. I'm not one for love stories (what I call "girl porn") that presents the perfect love story that will never be my love story but this is the second one I've read. The first one is called "learning to breathe again" by Tammy Trent. It was amazing. The book is about Tammy Trent's experience of suddenly losing her husband and learning to breathe again. Amazing. I remember thinking prior to the book (because I heard her talk on the radio) that I would be fine if put in that situation because at the time I didn't have kids, have a career, etc. And then when I read and felt her emotion, I began begging God to not ever test me in that situation. Good read.

Anyway, off to read the book. Thanks Cori and Renae for sharing with me!

A lot on my plate...

1. Plans for a class reunion this summer. Have contact 43 of ~230 classmates. Eek, lots to contact yet.
2. Girls Night Out activity for some friends and bible study buddies for March 28th ish
3. Soup cook-off at the office on March 25th
4. Junior High Girls Mom and Daughter Dessert: tentatively April12th
5. Meals for N&M who are expecting a baby any day now

I think I'm missing something...

Other things in the very near future include Ryan's birthday and Easter. Ryan is on call for Easter AGAIN this year so that will at least be local. But that also means that we need to plan a trip to see his grandparents as they've not seen my kiddos since Christmas. Ahh, when will I be finished planning?

I wish I could get paid to do this kind of stuff full time. I love doing it but don't have the hours in the day to get it done after my work day.

What do you get Paid?

While searching for something else, I came across 3 websites with some interesting information:

1. This random Iowa Treasure Hunt site allows you to search for unclaimed property. I was hoping it would be like a winning lotto ticket for me so I searched my last name. And what did I find? I found that Ryan's cousin has $28.86 in unclaimed property. Fantastagirl, if you were living in Washington, you would have some money too. Iowa Geek, I looked for you but no luck. I was hoping you would have an unknown large sum of cash too. It's a fun site, check it out.
2. So, onto what I was actually searching for: the state of Iowa has a searchable database (by name) for the salary of state of Iowa employees. Do you want to know what your old prof gets paid? You can look it up here. Do you want to know what that DNR guy get paid. You can also look it up on this site. I had a fun few minutes looking up the salary of some friends I know that are state employees.
3. And that got me curious. As a federal employee, I know that my salary is public information. But, I wondered, can it be searched my my name. And you bet, with a little help of google, I found an old one. You can look up salaries from 2006 for federal employees. My old boss at the Forest Service, yep, found his income. Ryan's uncle who does amazing things with "communities" of plaque, yep, his can be found too.

I was amazed at the wealth of information I could find on these 3 sites! Happy Hunting!

DEBT FREE

Okay, so I'm a fan of Dave Ramsey and I thought I was doing his plan for getting out of debt. But, the other day on his radio show, he clarified with another caller that if the guy wasn't exactly doing his plan, than he wasn't doing Dave's plan at all. Hmm, okay. So, I really like Dave Ramsey and would recommend him to everyone but I'm not doing his plan. In Dave's Get out of Debt plan, you would stop investing in retirement until you get out of debt. Because I understand compounding interest and because our debt load was pretty minor, I didn't stop putting money in my Roth. With that said,

WE'RE DEBT FREE

except our home

Yes, that's right, we don't owe any one anything with the exception of our mortgage which we're working to pay down faster than normal. And not only that, but after taking the daveRamsey class, I am much more informed about finances, insurance, real estate, etc.

Church Potluck

Sunday church potlucks are always fun. We typically sit with the same group of people, pass our kids around, eat too much food and have a good time. This past Sunday I decided to sit with Scott's family (Scott, his new fiance, her son and her son's friend). As I walked by the little boys to set my plate down I saw that one of them had his hands cupped together and full of food. My initial thought was that he was playing with his food and trying to gross out his friend. After taking a quick look at the childs plate, I realized that his hands were holding puke. Yup, you got it, puke! I quickly sat my plate down, grabbed the kid's napkin and scraped the nastiness into my own hands. Took my napkin and wiped the liquids off his hands. Ah, the warm feeling of someone else's puke in your hands. How's that for the 'ol appetite. By now the fiance asks what's going on and the friend replies "i threw up in my hands". All the better. I discarded the brat piecess, liquid and other fun stuff into the trash, washed my hands and went back to the table. Good thing the fiance was done eating because she pushed her plate away as it ruined her appetite. Nope, not me. I sat right down and started in on my tasty meal. And when it came time to need a napkin, I stole Shane's since mine had already been used!

Happy Friday!

Pants

Nope, not writing about the brown ones today. Although I guess I can update you and let you know that I wore them once since then and didn't bother to color the string and it really didn't bother me at all. With that said, the real post...

Lately, my pants are too big. This is good and bad. I'm habitual and have gotten very used to my jeans, belts, etc. However, I recently opened a storage tote of jeans. These were the jeans pre Scott that I knew I couldn't wear anymore because of those darn hips. I've been able to wear the pre-scott jeans that were loose fitting but this tote had regular, fitted jeans with a normal waist. I pulled out a pair and told Ryan that it would be nothing short of a miracle if I could get them on. He cheered me on when I had my legs in them but I informed him that I had yet to get them up over my hips. However, I was amazed when I pulled them right up and didn't even have to suck in my gut to zip them up. Gasp. They fit! I've appreciated the low rise jeans that allow my flab to hang over and not get noticed. These jeans worked even though they weren't low rise. My tummy was a little more noticeable but they worked.

Today, I have on a pair of khakis in the original size. Yee-flippin-haw! Now, I just have to get used to jeans that have a waist. Yipee! Its like having new clothes again!

Cookies

A while back at Sarah's (a wonderful cook/baker), I had these awesome german chocolate cookies. Made very simply (my kind of recipe) and with wonderful taste, I had to have the recipe. Made them last week with Scott and shared a few Ryan, my folks and Chris (a bachelor buddy of Ryan's). They were gone, almost instantly. We started with 3 dozen and you would have never known they were in the house except the left over frosting. Anyway, I'm eager to make some more. I love me some good cookies. Girl Scout cookies are out and although not at all what I need if I want to keep my figure, I shouldn't be eating a box of cookies in two days. I really like those things. My favorites truly are the caramel delite and the mint chocolate ones. Umm, I have found that the little elves make both of those however I can only find the mint ones on a consistent basis. My mouth is now watering for some cookies. I NEED COOKIES. Okay, anyway, I read that Merritt has some recipes to make those cookies. Meritt, I would love to have those recipes. Will you put them on your blog or email them to me, please.

Gas Money

The last few weeks I've been picking up a coworker on my way. She's a fun lady and I like sharing half of my drive with her. With soaring gas prices (I know, $3.04 is low for you Cali people), my gas budget has also increased. Well, mid morning, my coworker came over and handed me cash and said it was for gas money for the last two weeks. I was way excited.

Hmm, what should I do with it? Put it towards my next scrapping toy (a dicut tool), towards my summer trip to CA, or something else? We're doing the budget thing and it will likely go right back into the general account, maybe even towards gas money for March, which would then free up some of our budget for vacation, etc.

Butt Kicking

Last night was a bad night, all around. I was supposed to be in the capitol city for work but the roads were bad (Jody, I so wanted to call you but opted to take the kids to see the great g's) and I opted to play it safe and stay home. Ryan's plans for a very quiet evening were a little disturbed and he was a little piturbed. Trying to focus on the reason for this post, I'll skip all the details even though I'd really like to get it off my chest. All these little things that were no big deal by themselves kept happening one right after another. And finally I'd had enough and stormed upstairs and crawled in bed. Knowing that my life in general has been stressed and also knowing full well that it has been my lack of time in the Word and being quiet before God, I avoided the light switch and grabbed my bible. Not even knowing where to begin, I opened it up and decided I would read whatever page I opened to. It was 2 Chronicles 14 and 15. Immediately my mood brightened when I read the subtitle and realized it was about king Asa. Curious, because I have a buddy that named his child Asa, I started right in reading. Now, I was reading The Message version which is a paraphrase but a little light reading was good considering my attitude. I started with chapter 15 first and here's a few things I read:

• God will stick with you as long as you stick with him. If you look for him he will let himself be found
• when they were in trouble and got serious, and decided to seek God, the God of Israel, God let himself be found
• Asa...took a deep breath, then rolled up his sleeves, and went to work
• they bound themselves in a covenant to seek God, the God of their fathers, wholeheartedly, holding nothing back

And then I went back and read chapter 14 because it also pertained to Asa:

• Asa was a good king. He did things right in God's eyes
• God kept the peace
• [asa said:] We have this peaceful land because we sought God; he has given us rest from all troubles

And then on to chapter 16 to get the rest of the story of Asa

• "Because you went for help to the king of Aram and didn't ask God for help, you've lost a victory over the army of the king of Aram. Didn't the Ethiopians and Libyans come against you with superior forces, completely outclassing you with their chariots and cavalry? But you asked God for help and he gave you the victory. God is always on the alert, constantly on the lookout for people who are totally committed to him. You were foolish to go for human help when you could have had God's help. Now you're in trouble—one round of war after another."

How much am I like Asa? Thinking I can do it on my own? I can't, I know I can't. I know that things work out best when I let God be in control. So, what am I doing? God is always on the alert, constantly looking out for people who are totally committed to him! Yeah God, I'm sorry for being the foolish one and trying to do it on my own when I could have your help. Please help. Like my mom said when I was growing up, I need an attitude adjustment!

Sunset

This is a view of the sunset last night just down the road from my house on my way home:

Habits

Bethany has this funny habit. When she seemingly gets nervous, she'll tuck her head down and roll her eyes up to look at you. Now, she does this with an added smile.
Scott has this habit too. He always likes to be holding Bethany's hand. It doesn't matter if she's in her carseat, her jumparoo or asleep in bed, he likes to hold her hand. Its very cute.

Other fun habits that they'd be embarrassed if they knew I shared:

1. They are habitual about when they poop. Scott is a morning pooper and boy am I dissapointed when I don't get him to daycare in time :) Bethany likes to poop when she's in her high chair at the supper table. Its lovely to be chewing on a piece of meat and hear her passing gas, grunting and pushing it out

2. Bethany likes to grab at her genital area when her diaper comes off. Makes for a lot of fun when I'm trying to apply diaper rash cream!

3. Scott will avoid the "big boy potty" at all costs, even if a fresh cookie or dish of change (he loves both) are placed in front of him.

Dear Grandpa and Grandma

We're sure glad you're near. We love being able to see you more often so that we can read books, make houses, go see Arthur, eat at McD's and watch Veggie Tales. We love you!

Scott & Bethany

She likes to Eat

Tracy thought this would be a funny picture to sneak on my camera. Tracy took a bite out of a cookie and handed it to Bethany for the photo op. But, before Tracy could take the picture, Bethany had the cookie in her mouth. Atta girl Bethany. This child doesn't mess around when it comes to food. We can no longer sit down for a meal without her letting us know that she wants to be fed too. Yes, she also continues to think that she needs the home brewed milk as soon as she sees me after work, regardless of the fact that she may have had a bottle an hour earlier. No way this kid will be starved!

She's Mine

Yes, she's adorable! Yes, she's mine! Happy 8 month birthday Bethany!

Old Man Winter

Is it ever going to end? They say spring is just around the corner but it doesn't look like it. Although it is sunny out, its also snowing again. It's supposed to get up above freezing again tomorrow which will make for some snow melt (aka slush).

This picture was taken Dec 31st but the only difference now is deeper snow, shorter fence posts and big snow drifts.

Thank you God

I wish I had enough time to write the details of this story but not today.

Last night, after almost 4 hours of being gone on a (in my mind) 2 hour emergency call, Ryan still wasn't home. I would have been asleep and not really noticed (yes, I'm a good wife like that) except SCott woke and came in the room asking for his daddy who didn't put him to bed and hadn't kissed him goodnight. Fear came over me. I called and called. And in between calls I begged God to bring Ryan home safely. Watching the clock and knowing that Ryan would have usually called, I prayed some more and decided to call one more time before calling the other doctor and asking him to find Ryan. Needless to say, Ryan answered the phone and was safe. I didn't know to be glad he was safe or mad that he didn't call. But at that point, my prayers changed from begging to thanking God that he was safe and I continued to ask God to bring him home safely.

Oh thank you God... I really do like my husband, even if he doesn't take out the trash when I think he should!

Where is He?

We're trying to teach Scott to give. He knows the phrase "give back to God what he gave us" and likes to put his offerring in the plate. However yesterday when I dug out some change for him to take to church while driving down the road, the following conversation occurred:

me: Scott, did you take any money out of your piggy bank to give to God?
S: nope
[knowing the answer, I'm already digging in my change dish]
me: here Scott, you can give this to God
S: who's God, mommy?
me: umm
[not knowing how to explain to a 2 year old, I think I just repeated the phrase mentioned above]

a few minutes later as we're getting to church:
s: where's God? I want to give him my money? Mommy, where's God at?
[again, not a clue what to say. who prepares you for these moments... what should I say?]

in church when the plate was passed, we dug out his change from his pocket and thankfully he didn't ask the question. Thank you God - wherever you were at that moment ;)

Birthday

I was a little misleading last week - my birthday is tomorrow. And I don't say that now to get any birthday wishes or anything like that but rather to preface a my thoughts this morning. I got an email from a dear friend wishing me a happy birthday week. The following is our email conversation:
from me:
thanks Kel! Ryan and I are supposed to be going out for my birthday. Only, I'm not so excited about it for several reasons:
1. I don't feel cute today as I didn't get make up on my stressed out face.
2. I have an optometrist appt at 5pm and we have to stop at Fare.way and Wallyworld while we're out.
3. Ryan happened to share a conversation that he had with me in which he said "that doesn't work for me. My wife TOLD ME that I would be taking her to supper". Yep, that pretty much ruined it.
4. He's commented about being or not being able to get a free meal at chinese for my birthday. It's not about the freaking free meal. its about celebrating with your wife.

My crappy attitude will improve throughout the day. But, I'm lacking sleep, the roads were crap and I put too much chocolate in my hot chocolate... could be a long day :)

from kelly:
Ouch! That stings a bit and while I’m sure it was stressing it to get the joke out, it still doesn’t feel that great. I just got done reading a book called “For Women Only” about guys and how they really feel- I think all the girl’s in our small group should read it- but what really interests me is the companion book called “For Guys Only” that is supposed to explain us better to the guys in our life. I want to read it first and see if I think it’s accurate. Not all girl’s are the same, and I’m wondering if it really pegs us well.

The bright side- dinner out with your hubby- NO kids, right?

and my reply:
yeah, I'm sure he meant no harm but like he tells me, its not always what you say but how you say it. However, now that I think about it, it was both in this case.

I have that book too. I've read maybe 30 pages of it. Ryan has read both and thinks its spot on for what guys think. However, I've told him not to read to exact on the one about women, rather let me write one specifically about me. And then, I'd probably have to write 3, one for different moods, feeling sick, etc :) They also have one for young men and one for young women that are good. Right now I'm reading a book called Love & Respect, Love what she needs most, Respect what he needs most. Its been good but difficult to swallow. It talks about respecting him regardless of him deserving it. I'm trying but have a LONG way to go.

Night out with one kid. The B's are taking Scott to some Arthur (the cartoon) thing. We'll have Bethany. We thought about the new place but they're closed on Tuesday. And to be honest, unless hubby gets dressed up or there's something different about the night, then its just like every other time we stop and eat in Decorah. know what I mean?

All that to say that I'm being a whiner like my son. I want a special time to celebrate me. And I know that tonight will be rushed. Sure, I could request that we get all dressed up but that would require me leaving work even earlier to go home and put some make up on. Still not a bad idea but I did the ride-share thing this morning (betcha didn't know that was even possible in rural Iowa) and can't really leave any earlier. My boss is much more flexible with my time off requests. And even then, we would just be rushed to get to all the places we need to be before Scott's done and we need to get the kids home and in bed. They've each had colds lately and are whiny, fussy little ones.

Sweetheart Supper

I've been emailing with a friend about the Sweetheart supper and thought it would be fun to share what I wrote to her about the details of last night:

Thanks Diane. We, I think, were more blessed than the ladies. Because of the business of life, I had forgotten about the ladies until recently. Mom has taken on the food prep and other issues in the past but is busy as well. Ryan didn't want to miss out on the opportunity to minister to those ladies (reason #240 that I love him) so he asked our small group if they wanted to help me out. To be quite honest, I was a bit irritated because that then committed me to doing it. But now, I'm so thankful that he did (reason #241). We got invitations put together real quick and got them in the mail last minute. Of course, my generation wouldn't have worked so well with that turn around time on RSVP's but my ladies were wonderfully appreciative of the invitation and called right away. Anyway, we had help from most of our smaller small group and then Nick and Meg joined in the fun as well.

So, just because it was fun and I'm still excited about it, I'll share some details:
- Decided January 31st to do the Sweetheart Supper
- Tina (editor/owner of a local paper) and I designed invitation. I printed out invitations and Vanessa and I stuffed them and got them in the mail on Feb 9th.
- Had RSVP's by the 11th
- Sarah planned the meal (and nothing she cooks/bakes is simple) and had a grocery list to us on Tuesday night.
- Wed night at 7pm, Vanessa and I headed to Dtown for groceries. Dropped them off at Sarah's and was home by 11pm
- Thursday morning called the 12 that RSVP'd and changed the location due to threatening weather.
- Thursday Sarah and Kristy helped sarah assemble lasagnas. My mom cooked up the green beans.
- 430 pm I decorated while Ryan shoveled all the walk out front of the church. A very thoughtful couple heard what we were doing and donated a single rose with greenery and a vase for every lady. Vanessa brought those to the church.
- between 5 and 6 was stir crazy. We had lasagnas in 3 different locations, kids running around and not quite finished setting up when ladies started showing up 15 minutes early (so unlike my generation). Nick and Chris were chauffers.
- The meal was served, the ladies loved it. Nick was a hit with the ladies. Spenser (he's 9 by the way) was a great server and helped the ladies out the door, etc. The kitchen crew had dishes done, dried, put away while I gabbed with the ladies and dealt with a fussy child who, for a while, was only content if she was latched on.

We were able to invite more ladies this year (this is my 3rd year doing a meal for those older ladies who have either never married or are widowed) as those involved knew more ladies than mom and I know. We were quite blessed. I had several emails this morning from folks who helped. The S's who are experiencing bible study, God in general, and now serving others and doing so in partnership with their son, were very excited about last night. Nick was the ladies man but he and Meg thought it was heart warming. Ryan and I were glad to have many hands to help. I think we're all excited to see how we can serve next time!

Letter to RC

Dear Contact, how could I lose you. I understand you don't like being in my eyes and I'm sorry that Wednesday was such a long day. You irritate me so bad, I'm not sure why I allow you to be part of my life. Wednesday night when I got home, my eyes were dry and when I slipped out your twin, LC came out just fine. But I couldn't find you. I looked and looked for you. Even had hubby down on the ground looking for you. I'm committed to you, even at 11pm. But you were no where to be found. Did you sneak out some time during the day? Do you run away that morning and never join me for the day? Sometimes you try that but I'm persistent and take you along. What happened to you? Yesterday I had to wear my glasses. Today I forgot my glasses and life at work is a blur.

Oh, so you think its funny my dearest RC. I think not. And the joke is on you. You're being replaced on Tuesday with another pair. You, my dear friend, are disposable and I didn't really like you're attitude anyway. I hope this next trial pair will be better looking!

Happy Birthday to Me

Last night I saw a box on the coffee table but forgot to ask hubby what it was. While eating supper I mentioned that I forgot to pick up the mail on my way in. He was okay with that since the mail man brought it up to the door. Oh yeah, that's right, a box on the cofee table. So, I asked what it was. It was my Valentine's/Birthday present. He asked if I wanted it early. Now, I was curious so of course, I answered yes even though I really, really want a gift on my birthday. So, I asked him if he would re-wrap it so I could open it on my birthday. He said yes. Reason #239 that I love him.

He's a wonderful listener and heard me say at one point that I wanted a magnifying mirror. So, that's what a got - reason #240. Very cute and dainty looking. So cute, I think I'll put next to the antique mirror on my dresser that has perfume bottles on it.

It was a very thoughtful and wonderful gift. I'm thankful that he listens and gets me what I want. However, next time, I would love to have one gift for Valentine's Day (like a hand written love note like you wrote before we were married) and a seperate gift for my birthday. Thanks for listening!

I love you Ryan

You may frustrate me with the little things but I love you for a million reasons. Thank you for being my husband and best friend.

reason #236 that I love you: you stayed home with the sick babies yesterday and played Mr. Mom.

reason #237 that I love you: you were home with Scott who is quite the whiner and most definitely a mama's boy when he's sick.

reason #238 that I love you: I had a nice meal when I did finally get home.

flip flops

yup, its flip flop weather here today. In the 20's and a little snow melt in the parking lot.

Letter from Red

I once was lost... but now I'm found! I may be well insulated but I have been freezing my plastic off. Fortunately, I didn't get lost in the snow drifts or shattered on the driveway. I've been chillin' in the cup holder of Dave's work truck. Today my twin joined me bright and early only he was nice and warm. I will be home tonight and am ready to be useful once again.

Red
The travel mug

[Ryan and have become accustomed to hot chocolate each morning. We have several of the travel coffee mugs. I got two from an organization I'm in as a thank you. One is green and one is red. We also have two from a drug company rep that Ryan works with. I gave away my drug company one to a friend who needed one. So, we typically use the red and green ones. And because I like my hot chocolate with a different twist to it, we decided that I would use the red one and Ryan would use the green and we wouldn't get our cups mixed up. Well, good 'ol Red has been missing. Ryan was sure that I set it on the hood of my trunk and drove off and left it. I was sure that I hadn't because I would have seen it in my mirror when I backed out and I would have wondered that morning where my hot chocolate went when my hands were freezing. On Saturday I proved to Ryan that he was correct. I left a small diaper bag on the outside of the car and someone found it on our driveway and returned it. However, I did wonder what happened to it when I got to my destination but figured I left it by the door. So that solidified that I had to have lost the mug the same way. Only today, when I got in my bosses truck to head to a meeting, there was my red cup. Finally, I won't have to keep stealing Ryan's mugs each morning! Whew.]

Quickie

1. Today is day #4 of Scott's cold. No fun.
2. Saturday us girls (MIL, mom, bethany and I) had a girls afternoon out. Quilt show at the conservation center. Bethany was curious about quilt colors and animals.
3. The Sweetheart Supper is just around the corner. We have invited 29 women. I'm glad my small group offerred to help. My last planned activity for a bit.
4. Ryan had truck drama this weekend. It was zero degrees outside and the wind was howling like mad (we live on the top of a hill and always have wind). He was out changing a tire. His spare was frozen up underneath, etc. I offerred to help but was told to stay inside where it was warm. I made him hot chocolate and was COLD just standing outside long enough to put the hot chocolate in his truck.
5. No church for me Sunday. It was -40 with the wind chill. If something were to happen, it would be very difficult to keep them warm. We stayed home.
6. This week is going to fly by.

February 5th

It will forever be ingrained in my mind. The start of February comes and it hits me like a box of rocks. I miss my friend. It has been 12 years. The pain has subsided but the memories live on. I often wonder what life would be like if he was still around. Would Scott and I have stayed friends? Would my decision to commit my life to Christ have played out like it has? What a wonderful guy who lived a short life.

Like it was yesterday, I remember the details: the phone call about his accident. No brain activity, hearing that he died. The drive to the funeral, bawling like a baby when I saw his things on the stage. Visiting his parents afterwards, smelling his pillow, snooping through his desk with his dad. Wow. I miss my friend.

Reason #237 that I love Marriott

I had a reservation to stay at one of my favorite Marriott Hotels recently. I made the reservation for Wednesday night as I planned on scrapping with Jody and then attending a meeting in our state office. Then Tuesday night we got gobs of snow. I enjoyed a day home with my kiddos and cancelled plans to the capitol city. All day I kept telling myself that I needed to call Thursday to cancel my hotel reservations. Only, this morning while showering, I realized that I should have called yesterday. I instantly freaked out and then settled down realizing that I would just have to pay the fee for not cancelling. However, I called this morning and explained that I was confused on the date. After being on hold for two minutes, the Marriott employee let me know that she would cancel my reservation with no fee. Thank you Marriott, you will definitely keep my business.

Snow = Chains

Where I grew up, if you were going to the snow [you had to drive there because it didn't snow in the valley], you put chains on your tires. The highway patrol would sit on the side of the road and if you didn't have chains, you turned around and went back home. But out here in the midwest, people don't do that. It was so odd to me at first. The only time you see chains is when you drive past the tractor thats out in the field feeding cattle. Some people have studded tired though but no chains. Odd!

Ah, how sweet

yes, my husband is a stud muffin! Today at 4pm, the bell at the front desk rang as our secretary was gone already. Okay, farmers never hit the bell so that was odd in itself. Knowing it was a guy I'd just talked to at the counter, I jumped right up. Only, to my surprise it was Ryan with a pleasant surprise on his face. I jokingly asked him if he was here to bring me lunch as he unzipped his jacket and pulled out a red rose. Yup, a red rose, for no particular reason. It was so sweet. He was a few miles down the road on a call and went out of his way to come to town, buy a rose and bring it to me. It was perfect. And so sweet. I took a picture of it on my desk. I wish I would have taken a picture of him getting it out of his jacket or one of him giving it to me.

Cross Country Skiing

In the more recent years, my justification for doing things has changed [from exercise] to it being all about the photo op. Well, this day was a day of exercise but I did get a cool picture as well.

This was my photo op picture. It was difficult to get as my camera didn't like the cold! The next picture is of us girls. Three of us from work decided to have fun for a day. It was a ton of fun and now I have lots of bruising to prove it. Cross country skiing wasn't difficult but when I tried to make it become downhill skiing, it didn't go over so well. Its really hard for me to make corners with those big long skis. Oh what fun it was. It really works your hips, I found out. And by the end of the morning, I was using my arms to compensate for my naturally sore hips. My muscles were surprised to be used again :)

Pups

These puppies are so stinkin' cute. Steve, my coworker, raises Goldendoodles. They are cute little things. Ryan's uncle has one that's full grown and its a cool looking dog as well. Steve and I were chatting about them and I was amazed at how inexpensive they are. I guess his prices are cheap because we live in rural Iowa because they would cost TONS more if you were in the city buying them. One of the great things about goldendoodles is that they don't shed. So, people like me who hate animal hair don't have to worry about it. Poeple who have allergies don't have to worry either.

Anyone want a goldendoodle? I know where you can get one real cheap.

Funny Kid

A couple of funny things about Scott:

1. He loves soup. He'll spoon out all the juice first before he'll eat the rest. Doesn't matter what kind of soup it is. Sometimes, he even drinks the broth like you would the milk out of your cereal bowl. Only difference is that he's not eaten the food yet.
2. He loves to bake cookies. This was my sneaky attempt to get him on the potty. We baked chocolate chip cookies and then he couldn't have one until he pottied. Yup, it didn't work. I ate his share of the cookies instead. Last night I baked a few more. Gave one to Ryan, ate one and even let him have a bite. He really wanted a cookie. But when it came to going potty, he didn't want a cookie anymore.
3. He likes to tell you he wants to go potty. Get him in the bathroom and he changes his mind.
4. This kid is funny. When he poops, he doesn't want you in the room with him. I guess he likes to poop in private. However, since he's still in diapers, this means that he doesn't want us in the kitchen, living room or wherever he's standing. I have recently asked him to go in the bathroom when he poops. And he does it. But won't sit on the toilet!
5. He has to having "dippin' sauce". I don't think he cares what it is as long as he can dip into it. Scott doesn't want to eat something, ah, just squirt some ranch dressing or ketchup on his plate and he'll eat it.

He's not all fun and games. Last night he was up twice. Yes, twice. The second time he came in and told me he had poop. So, at 4am, I woke Ryan to change him. Thankfully, he didn't have poop. I think it was just his attempt at not getting scolded for being out of bed. He has been so tired lately but fights bed time so hard. Give up kid.

Snow

This picture is just a small glimpse of what I see every night on my way home. Nope, its not cattle grazing, those are white tail deer. Each night there are about 60 of them in the field right along the road. In order to get them to show up in the picture, I had to zoom way in and then you don't get to see the masses of them. I had several run out in front of me on the road yesterday. Please, please, feel free to come hunt up here. I know the farmers and

I remember the days when it was a huge deal if snow fell on the valley floor where I grew up. It might happen every 5 years and when it did there was hardly a covering of snow on the ground. That cracks me up now as we get snow on a regular basis.

As of right now, we are getting yet another snow storm. Expecting 2-3 inches throughout today and then some more over night. Will it ever end? Supposedly it's going to warm up over the weekend and maybe even hit 40. We'll be thinking we're having a heat wave for sure after having sub zero temps for a while.

Yes Mommy

She is so adorable. She is very attentive to those voices she knows and likes best: mommy, Scott and her Papa.

ADORABLE

Yes, I must admit that these two children are adorable. Not only that, they are well mannered children. Thank you God for that!

This morning, like every morning, Ryan helps me get out the door and headed to mom's. This morning was different though. Our kiddos stayed the night at my mom's. No, not what you were thinking; we had bible study last night and didn't want to take the kids out in the cold. After getting home around 1115 (way past my bedtime), I had to put away milk from the day, wash up the bottles, pump, wash again, take out my contacts, brush my teeth and head to bed. This allowed for a few minutes of conversation with Ryan. Apparently that wasn't enough though and we were awake for about an hour chatting while I tried to get warm. Anyway, this morning, as I headed out the door, my car was still in the garage. I figured Ryan just didn't back it out since I didn't have the kids to load up. Let me remind you that the temperatures are frigid and its nice to have a jump start on getting some heat in the car. Anyway, I get out to the car and it wasn't even running. I think my teeth were chattering as I drove to town! Figures... I must be chopped liver as it seems he only starts the car for the kids and not his wife! I'm just thankful that he does it most days and one day of cold helps me appreciate it even more.

I miss California

For several reasons lately I miss California:
1. My 10 year class reunion is around the corner
2. I haven't seen Cori for a long time
3. Yesterday I got an email from the associate dean who was responsible for me as a scholar. He had a very thoughtful email and was wanting updates from the scholars.

Why I miss California:
1. sun-kissed cheeks vs. frost bitten red ones
2. fresh citrus fruit vs. the crap in the store
3. fog that lifts vs. snow that just keeps building up
4. driving to the now for a day vs. hybernation
5. fresh clam chowder vs. deer meat
6. Tanned skin, sun-bleached hair vs. looking like a ghost

I did NOT sign up for this

The weather forcaster predicted a low of -15 last night. This morning when I looked at the temp, it said 6 degrees. Yes, that is cold but I'm kinda getting used to the frozen appendages after making three trips from the car to the house when I get home at night. As I dropped of the kids this morning, I left my gloves off. It was cold and I felt bad that Scott didn't have gloves on. He insists on not wearing them as they prevent him from getting a good grip on his hot chocolate and t-rex or whatever else he manages to carry outside. As I walked onto the porch, I looked at mom's thermometer. It was -20. Are you kidding me? I figured it was wrong. But how could it be wrong? Mine said 6. Yeah, it was cold but really what's the difference between zero (the temp when I got home last night) and -20? I so didn't sign up for this weather. I moved to Iowa, not northern Minnesota.

Every Hour

I so desperately want to be the creative, thoughtful and appreciative wife. And yesterday I had the perfect way of doing so. Ryan has an important appointment today and I want to make a point to pray for him every hour throughout the day and then the entire time of his appointment. But, what I thought would be fun was to make him little note cards, one for each hour to let him know what I would specifically be praying about. Yeah, I was going to stay up late and get that done. That didn't happen. Got home last night as youth kids were arriving. When that was over, I started laundry to wash Ryan's new shirt. Fed Bethany. Put away milk. Did dishes... it was 9pm, I stopped to eat supper. Pressed Ryan's shirt. Went to bed. I so wasn't motivated to do anything last night. Sorry honey, I still plan to pray for you though!

Will I Ever Be On Time Again

Some mornings I try really hard to be on time for work and something always gets in the way. I'm so lazy when its dark outside and cold in the house. I woke at 530, fed Bethany and should have started my day so I could, for once, wear make up, have some quiet time and eat breakfast before I leave. Nope, not this morning, I snuggled under a warm blanket for another hour before the rat race began. If it wasn't for my amazing husband, I would be so totally late. This morning moved right along. I even managed to press some slacks first. Headed out the door and was only 5 minutes behind. This is good. Got to the end of the driveway and realized I'd forgotten my contact solution and case that I'll need as today will be a LONG day. Turned around, went back home. Dangit, I was late again... but still earlier than my normal late. Thank you for flexible work schedules!

Bethany

If only I could read her mind. A picture is worth a thousand words. I could only imagine what she was thinking as her big brother held onto her by her ears.

She's growing like a weed. She throws a fit every time we eat. She thinks she has to eat too. The other night, every time I'd lift up my mug of hot chocolate to take a drink, she'd catch a glimpse and start fussing. She WANTED that mug. She's not tasted hot chocolate but she seemed to think that she needed it since I was putting it to my mouth.

In other news, she's absolutely adorable. Even when its way past her (and my) bedtime. She was laughing at everything we said and did last night. She was so giggly. It was fun. That is, until she realized she was in bed by herself, no more music, no more lights. Then she cried. And this morning, a bright and beautiful little baby who pooped some nastiness!

Got Milk?

Dangit, I forgot to turn the photo. Too bad now, I'm in a hurry. This is actually yogurt. Scott thinks that you're supposed to have yogurt with every meal. He'd even settle with it being a dessert. He's such a cutie.

Wow, look at that bed head. I gave him his 2nd haircut in two weeks last night. He's such a cute little boy!

I didn't sign up for this, or did I?

And this was considered warm in comparison to now! Cori, it was -5 this morning when I left for work. Today's high was 10. Yes, 10 degrees but we at least got above the single digits. My furnace ran ALOT in the last few days! I was outside yesterday scooping my walk and my fingers were COLD after just a few minutes. It is definitely winter weather. However, with that said, the snow fall was amazing yesterday. The landscape is beautiful. So crisp looking. Very cool (no pun intended). I remember trying to explain to Cori, my San Diego pal, how the fog sticks to everything when it gets below freezing. This was a picture that I took during that time. You can't really tell. I wish I had pictures of things covered in ice, it looks really cool that way too.

I'm loving the cold weather. So many native mid westerners are complaining about the cold. Yeah, its definitely cold but at least its pretty to look at. Could be worse, I guess. In the recent days, we ran out of wood for the main floor wood burner. That is, wood that is stacked on the porch. If we really wanted wood, we could bring some up from the basement. Anyway, this would be a good time to burn wood on the main floor but instead, while we were home all day yesterday, the furnace provided our heat! I know winters like this exist but this is the first one since I've lived here. My friends to the South, even 200 miles south, don't experience this type of weather typically. So, Cori, we're experiencing the Minnesota winter - it has apparently decided to cross over into our beautiful state. Its about time we get some real winter.

I can be bribed

Jody has her Valentine's bribing going on right now. Go over, check her out, but don't sign up because I want to win ;)

Weather

Yeah, Cori, I miss you right now. I miss your weather too. Having read your blog update, I really wanted to look for an airline ticket. I was laughing out loud and my mother in law commented that she hadn't heard me ever laugh like that before. I was certainly entertained.

You have 66 degree weather. That, my friend, is amazing. Our high was -4. Yes, I typed that correctly, NEGATIVE FOUR. Let me tell you what, that is cold! Fortunately when I was outside each time today, there was no wind. At anything negative for temperature, you certainly don't stand outside to chat or do anything else. This is one reason that when it becomes 30 degrees, I walk around without a coat.

I remember returning to Fresno after my house hunting trip to NE Iowa. It was 40 at home and I had my car windows open and didn't wear a jacket. Those were the days! I'm okay with cold as long as it doesn't last too long. We've had snow/ice on the ground since the first weekend in December. We're due for a few warm days to melt it all off.

In the mean time, I will stay all warm and cozy inside somewhere.

Do I Dare?

Do you ever dare write about your inlaws while one of them is sitting next to you? I guess you can when you have good things to say. With all of yesterday's events, craziness and cold weather, we stayed the night at the inlaws. Thursday night we packed up the kids and ourselves for an over night stay. Fortunately the only thing I forgot was a toothbrush, which is easy to come by when your father in law is a dentist. Following my dentist appointment, Mark was able to fit Ryan in a clean his teeth. A short time later I headed to my optometrist appointment. I was very nervous about not getting my contacts in and having to schedule yet another appointment. I even spent time begging God to help the process go smoothly. Things went amazingly well and I walked out with my new contacts. Praise God, he answers big and little prayers. That night, my new dentist and his wife treated us to pizza at the local joint. We went back to the house and eventually crawled in the guest bed.

That was interesting in and of itself. Scott was in the twin bed, Bethany was in her carseat and Ryan and i were in the guest bed. Let's just say that I didn't get a lot of sleep between the fussing, falling out of bed and sheet sharing.

With all that said, it wasn't the point of my post. My point was my inlaws, right? It has been lovely. Not only did I have a free trip to the dentist, but they mean so much more. They are wonderful and I'm so glad to have them near. No, they aren't my parents; they have their own qualities and quirks but they've been quite the blessing. Its fun to be comfortable staying at their house for a night (or two). Watching them with my children is a true joy. Eating the food my mother in law prepares adds a few calories to my diet but its yum, yum.

Today was a blast. I left for a few hours and met some of the girls in town for a chick flick, or girl porn, as we call it. Upon returning, my father in law polished up my necklace and wedding ring after showing me how to start the '78 toyota land cruiser of his. My mother in law hemmed up my two pairs of $5 slacks. My kiddos have been taken care of, our bellies fed. I'm glad to not only be blessed with a wonderful husband, but also his wonderful parents.

Not By Choice

Wednesday evening a beautiful snow fall began. Thursday morning was the typical morning - all except that I was up earlier than usual. According to the local radio station, we were to receive 4 more inches, with a total storm of 6 inches. Do the math and that means we got 2 inches over night. We had more at our house but assumed it was a localized issue so I headed to work. Driving on the state highway was decent and town was not so great - all to be expected. However, after dropping off the kids, I headed a different way to work as this way was half the distance to a highway. I could hardly get around the corner an up over the bridge. As I continued down the county road, it didn't improve. A beautiful snow was falling and as I drove, I continually hesitated to make the 25 mile trip to the office. Finally, I turned around and called the office. I figured the roads were only going to get worse and I would then have to drive back home.

Yes, I chose to turn around but based on the safety issue, it really wasn't a choice. I spent most of the day at my mom's house working on Bethany's baby quilt that I've ignored for the last 3 months. The road home that night was fine. I so could have gone to work but I'm glad that I have a job that allows for flexibility for such situations.

Thursday night while entertaining 10 guests, the phone rang. It was Ryan's dad. Ryan's mom was heading down Friday morning to keep the kids for the day. But because of some emergency at home, she would be driving down, picking up the kids and driving back to her house with them. Its a 50 minute trip one way. The next morning, I was again up early. Only this time I was thinking of my schedule for the day. I had an appointment with Ryan's dad to get my teeth cleaned (yes Merrit, you missed part of the story. My father in law is a dentist and just moved to the area) followed by an appointment with the optometrist. I would have to leave work by 1145 to get home, pick up my hubby and get to my appointment on time. Considering all the options (100 mile drive for my mother in law, 50 mile drive for me for less than 4 hours of work), I chose to stay home again. I guess I had a choicec on that one.

So, today, is day #3 of my weekend and I have 2 to go. Not by choice.

Class Reunion

For a while now I've been dreaming of my class reunion. In fact, for almost 4 years... since hubby had his. Well, more recently I've started talking to others about it. Since I have lotsa miles to travel to get there. I emailed the guy I thought was our president. Only to find out that he wasn't. But fortunately, I just saw a link to her brand new blog off of ashley's blog so I emailed her. I really hope that someone takes the initiative to plan something. I want to see some old friends. I plan to go home anyway and see those friends I talk to and see family but I'd like to see other classmates that I don't know how to get a hold of.

Dentist Drama

My father in law is my new dentist, again. Yipee. I waited to make an appointment until I knew for sure that he would be able to clean my teeth. Well, today I called for the appointment and the receptionist sweetly told me that mark would check my teeth and then the hygenist would do the cleaning. I gulped.

At lunch time, I called mark on his cell phone and explained the situation. he promptly went to the front desk and fixed it. He will be cleaning my teeth at 1pm on Friday. I hope the receptionist doesn't think I'm a brat. Well, I am, but not in this situation.

A Four-Eyed Failure

I haven't heard the term four-eyes in a long time so I thought I'd use it. Maybe, just maybe, glasses have become a cool thing, or a sophisticated thing.

i despise going to the optometrist

In my life, I have been a success at everything that I've put lots of effort into (except a job application one time). Going to the optometrist frustrates and stresses me out. I know what those little charts are for but I can't stand having to read them for two reasons: 1) after reading through the line one time, I basically have it memorized (cause I'm a nerd like that) which does me no good because I can cheat my way through the remainder of the exam without even trying and 2) because I feel like a total failure when I can't quite read the line. If in context of a word, I can make it out but when its random letters, I can't really tell if its a "C" or "O", etc. Albeit humbling, which is a necessary thing in my life, I don't like it one bit. And add to it that they ask me to read crap after they've been jacking with my eyes for 20 minutes. Who in the world can read after that?

All that to say that I couldn't get the contacts in. I was able to get the left contact in but not the right. It was frustrating to me. They require that you take them in and out 3 times before you can take them home. I had to reschedule another time to irritate the snot out of my eyes. Dangit. The tech said that my contacts are larger and round because of the stigmatism (as compared to someone who is near or far sighted) so that makes them more difficult to put in. And I have wonderful reflexes which make it even more difficult. I have to practice this week holding my eye open and touching it. However, I can do that, its getting the contact to stay on my eye before I close my upper lid. Friday could be interesting. I'll have one hour before closing to get it accomplished, which is probably a good thing as my eyes are super irritated now.

Update on the Pepperoni

I got on the hormel website and wrote a letter of complaint. They replied within 8 hours. That's amazing. I wish I would have saved the letter I sent them but I didn't think about doing so. Regardless I got a very appropriate reply from the company:

Ms Buitenwerf,
Thank you for reporting your experience with HORMEL(r) PILLOW PACK(r) Pepperoni. We can understand your disappointment with your package turning moldy so soon after opening. We do take numerous precautions to eliminate this type of situation from occurring. Unfortunately on occasion, between production, shipping and handling of the product a small imperfection can arise in the package allowing air to enter, thus allowing mold to form. Mold is certainly unappetizing but it is unlikely to cause a foodborne illness. In any event, we certainly apologize that you received a package in this condition. For future purchases know that pepperoni will keep in your refrigerator for 3 weeks after opening, the use by date on the package is obsolete once opened. Your method of freezing an opened package is recommend. Your report is extremely unusual and we appreciate having the opportunity to review the manufacturing process to prevent recurrence. We share your concern for quality and thank you for taking the time to contact us. We hope you will continue to purchase our products with confidence. We are mailing you compensation for your use.

Gina
Consumer Response Specialist

Now, how's that for customer service?

What a Stud

I know that I have a lot of room for improvement in my marriage. Not that things are bad, but they could be amazing. I'm trying to learn the fine line between being honest with my feelings and respecting Ryan. Its a hard line to find, let alone be aware of it. Recently, Family Life Today had a broadcast titled Baby Steps to a better Marriage. And it had some good info in it. That along with some other things recently (a new book from my brother in law, a prayer card on my desk that reminds me to pray for my husband) have me thinking about how I speak to him verbally and non verbally.

.... (I'm trying to make this brief)

All that to say, Ryan rocks! He's been a wonderful help around the house lately. Saturday he did lots of cooking. Last night supper was ready when I got home. We had taco soup. And after supper when I should have been cleaning, I was cold and snuggled up on the couch and fell asleep. Meanwhile, Ryan was watching a movie with Scott and folding laundry. Yup, he rocks. I'm so thankful for his willingness to help out more around the house. It takes some of the stress of my shoulders (which is a lot right now) and makes me that much more attracted to him. Did I mention that he also did the dishes? Yes, you may agree, what a man!

What do pepperoni and the web have in common?

I bought hormel pepperoni a while back to make personal pizzas with english muffins for lunch at work. Within two weeks the pepperoni was molding. I was ticked as I'd bought it to help reduce the price of my lunches and now I was throwing away a product that I couldn't use. I even checked the seal and it had been closed. So, why did it go bad when the date on it was mid march?

Today when I was in the grocery store, I approached the lady at the meat counter about. After a brief conversation, she suggested that I contact them via their website or 800 number. Having nothing to lose, I did just that. Yup, I went on the website and found the contact page and sent them an email about it. I buy several of their products and never have a problem before this. Do you think they will reply? Do companies really have good customer service any more?

I will give you rest

God, I'm counting on your promise to give me rest. Its been a wild and hectic last few days!

Saturday I made a quick trip over the river and through the woods and even past fantastagirl's house to the city. I had to return a few items and buy Scott some new jeans as his were getting snug around the center (if the kid would only potty train it wouldn't be an issue). The trip was a quick one compared to normal but still a long one as I took both kids down there. I ended up buying several baby gifts and lots of clothes at OldN*vy since they had a good sale going on. Anyway, got home and helped Ryan finish up the 2 weeks worth of meals that he was cooking. He finished up after 10 and then I made 3 chicken lasagnas and finished up at 1130pm. I was TIRED by time I climbed in bed.

Sunday was another whirlwind day. I was 10 minutes late to church to start with. And I'd even gotten up early however, I changed Bethany 4 different times AFTER Ryan had already gotten her ready for church. She must have had a yucky tummy. Following church was the potluck lunch, then the annual business meeting. My butt was so sore after sitting for 5 hours and have I mentioned that I have a problematic tailbone so sitting is very uncomfortable. I left there in time to run one of the lasagnas to a friend who just had eye surgery. I visited for an hour before having to leave for my next committment. I stopped by moms to feed Bethany and take the kids over to Sarah's where we talked about our Junior High youth group plans (lotsa change happening there... we have them reading Technical Virgin, How far is too far), making chinese food for supper, scarfing two plate fulls of that and hurrying off to my financial class. I dropped Scott off at mom's after the class, went home and wasted no time putting Bethany to bed and crawling under the covers myself.

All this plus the added stress of a wild few days at work. Some of it very frustrating but most of it just being plain swamped. I so need a vacation! God, I want that rest... maybe I need to go read about that and see specifically what your Word says about it.

ps: I get my contacts today. After actually wearing glasses all the time now, I don't like them getting dirty, fogged up, etc. I've had a cold for a few days and the dry itchy eyes but that seems better today. HOwever, I've been dizzy all morning so I hope this contact thing works today. I did NOT like them putting the contacts in last week. The nurse lady told me I had very good reflexes!

OCD about the pants

Okay, I really don't have OCD nor do I care that much about the pants. But now, this has become a fun game for me. Last night as I was doing laundry, I grabbed the brown pants. And for several seconds, I held them in my hand debating on washing them or not. If they don't get washed, then I can't wear them again. I do the same thing with one of Ryan's shirts. I hate the shirt. He knows I hate the shirt and continues to wear it. So, it often times finds its way to the bottom of the pile and doesn't make its way into the wash until I need something to help fill the last load!

Tina Suggests a Minivan

Tina, did you grow up riding in one of these:

I bet not. I did, only ours was red. If you were in the back, you never got the air or heat it seemed like. You couldn't open windows, it was like a jungle gym getting out, etc. I know they're different today but I still have that old opinion of them. Last night, every where I stopped, there was a new minivan next to me so I began pondering the idea. Now, let me clarify that I'm not getting soft to the idea of one, rather I was entertained thinking about how they've changed in the last 20 years. We had no folding seats, no hiding cargo space, no dvd players, no control of heat or radio, no fancy cup holders, etc. Times are a changin', I do realize. But, today, even with my paid off car and growing family, I am still 100% against them.

I would love to be a cool mom whose kids adore her and who drives an SUV or a truck! I found the perfect picture to summarize my thoughts:

Weather Hot Shot

In late November, I took a picture of the sunset view from my office. I posted it to my blog here and also sent it to KWWL, the news station that I like. Today, I got an email from the meteorologist saying:
Thanks for the weather photo. It will air on Today in Iowa tomorrow morning (1/10/08) around 6:25.
That's fun. I had long decided that they didn't use the picture. Now my husband isn't the only one with a picture that made the news!

Letter to the Car

Car, I don't like you. I've not liked you from the beginning. You will never compare to the Saturn. Yes, it was dumb to think buying you was a good idea. I was young, newly married, and thought I had money. You've been a waste of money. Why did I ever get rid of the paid for Saturn and begin paying for a new car? You're getting old now and have joined the 100,000 mile club. I still don't like you. You get decent gas mileage but you're tiny. You can be serviced locally but you don't like snow and ice. You have been safe and protected me but you show wear.

Dearest car, today is the first time I think I'm truly thankful for you. Today you are paid for. Now more draining my bank account for you. That payment will likely now go to repairs but at least I'm not making a payment and paying for repairs. As much as I like you today, I wouldn't expect a bond of friendship. You are not acceptable for weekend trips as you can't carry all the crap that I need to pack and the additional crap that I buy while gone. So my dear car, today, I will begin saving for a replacement. Keep up the good work in the mean time and you will remain on my good list.

Happy owner

Update on Pants situation

Jerelyn, you had a wonderful idea and I've even considered that. However, I laugh at the idea for several reasons:
1. Its easier to gripe about it
2. Its more fun, and somewhat entertaining to discover it each time
3. Who in the world has time to remove the button and sew it back on...
4. Bethany requires lots of attention
5. Scott wants me to read him a million books each night - actually only 2-3 books but we repeat them lots of times each night.
6. My maid has been on vacation since I got married
7. I have a stack of things to be mended which I've not got to... the most recent is the pants I got from NY&Company that are too long.

I know sweet friend that your life is busy as well and that you have ~20 kids. However, your kids go home after your work day whereas my work day ends and then I start my second job - the parent/wife/maid one.

again

I just realized once again that I'm wearing those pants with the different colored string on the button and its still frustrating!

William Edward Goat

William Edward Goat has been a part of the family since 2003. In a rural attempt at a weed-eater, I begged Ryan to let me have a goat. His purpose was to eat the weeds in the fence line as we were newly married and didn't have the time or money for a weed wacker. William Edward Goat, and to those who knew him well Bill E. Goat, had a wonderful personality and in more ways than one became dear to our hearts. When Ryan strung the hot wire fence and Bill E. chewed on it and his mouth turned black, my heart ached for him. It wasn't long that we figured out he was too stupid to fear the electric fence and we had to tie him up. Before long, I felt sorry for our precious little goat and would take him for walks. The stubborn animal would try to pull me all over so we put on a gentle leader leash and I was back in control as we walked/jogged the lane. And then, someone had the bright idea to put Bill E. on zip line so he could rotationally grazed the pasture. Ryan has spent many hours untangling, fixing and tightening the line. The goat has proved to be an important part of the composting process in the pasture. Some winters the goat has spent up close the the house, others in the barn and some out in the pasture. With his daily ration of hay and water, this time of year he stays happy in his little goat house. Until recently. Thursday night, he was making noise when I got home. I said "hi" to him and went in the house. Friday morning when Ryan went out to feed him, he was gone. Well, not really gone, but dead. William lay frozen solid with his head sticking out of his house.

Not sure what happened to our little buddy. But he was not around to make noise anymore. I've been so thankful that Ryan took on the goat chores this winter so I could keep my butt in the warm house. However, as of Friday, I wish that I'd been on goat duty so maybe, just maybe he'd still be alive. Scott will miss him this spring and summer.

My dear william, I'm sorry that I didn't get you over to Gail's barn so you could play with the donkey and horses. I'm sorry that you for some unknown reason, didn't stay alive. You made it through the cold part of the winter and as it finally warmed up, you are gone. May you rest in peace as you were taken down the hill across the fence where the birds can feast on you!

*we've not had the best of luck with our animals this year. Mocha was hit by a car, we gave Keller away and now William is gone. DJ the dog has sores on his body and the vet has started him on antibiotics. Cats, beware.

This is the Life

Right this minute I'm sitting on the couch at my inlaws. And its wonderful to be here for several reasons:
1. This is day 4.5 of my long weekend. I took off at noon on Friday and will go back to work tomorrow for a short week.
2. I'm playing on the internet while I sit my lazy hiney on the couch with a big screened brand new lap top in my lap.
3. Kris, a good friend of Ryan's family, just put Bethany down for a nap. She's a wonderful help.
4. Scott is currently being entertained by his grandma B. She's a blessing of a Grandma!
5. Did I mention that I'm lazily hanging out on the couch? The guys are happy watching another game of football and I'm happy not to be chasing my kids.
6. I had a simple ham and swiss cheese for lunch. It was perfect, I'm a simple girl - for the most part.

Gifts

Okay, so I try not to focus too much on gifts for Christmas but rather take time to appreciate the One true gift for which we celebrate. However, with that said, I love giving gifts. It's so much fun.

I was very spoiled this year, as I usually am. Ryan got me a practical gift but I'm perfectly happy with my new item... when it arrives. He also got me new headphones for my ipod which was another perfect gift. Mom made me a beautiful Christmas tree skirt which took plenty of her time, talent and money. She and Ralph also got me a few other little things - candy and a new shirt. Dad came to visit which is a wonderful gift as he'd not yet met Bethany. And be brought me freshly picked oranges. Yum, yum! My inlaws gave me a little wall hanging that she made. its really cute. So, not tons of crap that I'll never use but enough for me to appreciate. I'm thankful.

And now, I'm really curious. What did you get for Christmas?

Merry Christmas

More thoughts from my "break"

Not as exciting but just now as I was taking my "break", I looked down to notice that my very cute brown pants with the stylish brown button is attached with khaki colored string. OldNavy, you dissapointed me today. And how come I've worn these pants a million times and never noticed it before?

Opening Doors

Last week I was in the bathroom pumping during my work day. As usual, I locked the door, closed it and started in with my "break". As usual, someone comes down the hall towards the bathroom and as usual, I get nervous and look over to double check that I did lock the door. Once again I was safe. Only, this time, when the person grabbed the door handle, the door began to open. Within seconds, they walked away. Yes, God abstained from humiliating me at that very moment. Whoever it was almost got a view of my milkers and my gut! How sickening! I still don't know why the door never opened all the way, maybe they heard my pump making its wierd noise. You bet I stepped right over to the door and pushed it all the way shut, making sure it clicked shut.

As I type this, it takes me back to my senior year of high school. One of my brothers buddies was a class mate of mine. He practically lived at our house. Well, you can imagine how the rest of the story goes but I'll tell it anyway. I had just gotten out of the shower, went in my room and shut the door. Put on under garments and then sat on my bed to read my mail. Outside in the hallway, my brother and his buddy were screwing around, as usual. My brother shoved Albert right into my doorway. Yes, I'd made sure my door was closed and locked. Only, it appeared to be closed but hadn't clicked shut. Here comes Albert tripping over himself, in more way than one, as he looks up to see me sitting in my bra and panties on my bed.

Ah, the joys of being humbled!

Playing the #'s game

If you were to stare at your gut for half an hour each day, do you think it would motivate you to lose weight, eat healthier, excercise, etc? When I pump twice a day at work, the only location that works is right in front of the bathroom mirror. Not so exciting, but it is motivating. Last week, I had a random thought (which is very normal for me). I thought that I'd like to get back down to my pre-scott weight. Ideally, I'd like to be pre-marriage weight but I wanted to be realistic with myself. Check out these numbers:

Pre-marriage: 118-122
Pre-Scott: 125
9 mos pregnant: 167
pre-Bethany: 130, I think
9 mos pregnant: 153
just the other day: 125

Yee, flippin' haw! I was so excited. I've not been on the scale in a while and never expected to weigh that. However, I have noticed that my gut is smaller than pre-bethany and I can fit into slacks that were pre-scott again. Woo hoo! Maybe pre-marriage isn't unrealistic after all!

* the numbers above may be a little off here and there but they're my best guess according to what I started at and what I gained with each kid.

Scott, I am your mommy!

I think my son has basically lived at my mom's this week. Sunday night he stayed with her. Monday night we got home at 7pm and played a little together while putting up the Christmas tree. Tuesday night I met Ryan, the kids and his parents for supper and then they came home with us to decorate the tree. Scott played with his grandpa for the most part. Wednesday I came home late and he stayed at his grammy's. Saw him for a few minutes before work and a few minutes after work. I went to bible study and he stayed at his Grammy's. Tonight he will go home with his dad but I have a Christmas party to attend so I won't see him then. I'm really looking forward to being home Saturday with him. Sunday is a full day and after church my inlaws will watch the kids so I won't see him then either. I promise though. I am Scott's mommy and do love to have time with my son!

Shopping

The car got "fixed" and $204 later, I took it home. Only now it makes a funny buzzing noise when the fan is on.

I did finally go shopping. Tuesday all day to Rochester with one of my partners in crime. The weather was nasty but we headed north and had clean roads, spent lots of money, had a good time, bought ourselves gifts too, enjoyed the "butt warmers" (aka heated seats) and got a little Christmas shopping done too.

Wednesday I was working near the city and got done a little early. So, I headed over to the city to finish my shopping. It didn't quite get done but that's okay. I hate not being done, I'm usually done in October. Anyway, after a few hours and another fun purchase for myself, I met up with my girls. We shopped for our own version of Operation Christmas Child. We went to 7 stores. When Target was closing at 11pm, I decided to head home. I'd been walking around for 7 hours and my feet and hips hurt. So, I headed home. The girls finished shopping there and headed to another store. I got home at 1230 and was in bed by 1am. The rest of my girls however got home at 330am. They're crazy! Although, I don't know that I was much different on sleep time. I'd had a caramel frapp and don't usually drink coffee so I was pretty wired and didn't sleep.

The good thing is that we're almost done shopping. The bad thing is I got charged for the wrong ornament and paid $5 more than the price. The other bad thing was that Sam's no longer had the item I wanted to get for my brother in law for his gift! Oh well.

So much for shopping

Who in the world would want to drive 85 miles on half decent roads to shop in a super busy mayhem? ME. And who in the world would decide to go at noon when kids had yet to be fed, would need to be dropped off, etc? Me again. And what kind of sucker husband would agree to go? Yes, mine. Of course, he was just supporting his wife and is not at all really a sucker husband.

A quick changed of clothes and brief stop at moms to drop off the kids and we were on off to the city we go. Its now 1pm and we've not eaten. So we get to the nearest town with a BK and stop for a quick bite to eat at 2pm. Wait a second, let me back up a step... this was the same town that gave me hope for BK being open on Thanksgiving only to find out they were closed. Anyway, so we pull into BK drivethrough and I flip off the defrost/heater. As we leave, Ryan flips it back on. This is a necessary part of our trip since the hour drive down was freezing rain. With just our luck (I really don't believe in luck but couldn't think of another word), the fan wouldn't turn back on. Ryan continues driving towards the highway and I'm thinking this could be a problem. So, we pull over at the big blue store next the highway. After lots of phone calls to my dad, messing with fuses and relay switches and freezing our butts off, it still didn't work. We even went into the store to buy new fuses (and warm up a little) but that didn't help either. We spent an hour in all trying to figure out the problem before giving up and driving back home.

We never made it to the city to do the shopping. Instead we drove an hour in a toasty warm car to go through the BK drive through, buy new fuses at wally world, then drive the hour back home with no heat except what came off the running engine in 12 degree weather. Fortunately, we didn't hit freezing rain at all on the way home.

Eventually I'll do my Christmas shopping :) Until then, I might be using Christmas budget money to pay for my car to get fixed - for the 2nd time this week.

Andrew

For the past 25 days many of us having been praying for little Andrew. He was born with some heart complications. After two successful major heart surgeries, we continued to pray for healing. It was this morning at 955 that the little guy passed. He was 25 days old. My heart aches for Andrew's family. I couldn't imagine walking out of the hospital without my child. Multiple times this morning, I've found myself crying while grieving their loss. And now as I prepare to eat my lunch, there is a newborn in the lobby crying and I'm crying again.

I'm so glad we can home in an everlasting life with our risen Lord and Savior. What a gift, and a free gift at that!

My Life This Week

- I moved back in with my parents. Okay, not quite like that. But I did stay the last two nights there as I'm not able to traverse my own driveway. Ryan has 4wd and was able to go home, heat up the house and get me some clothes.
- Having one 4wd vehicle that fits 3 people sucks! We are a 4 person family and with our driveway, we need another 4wd. Although my husband would disagree, if I can't get down my driveway, something is wrong with that picture.
- Scott doesn't like the "pokey" Christmas tree and would only help his grammy decorate it after I put his gloves on him. What a goober!
- This was my weekend to clean and get ready for bible study at my house on Thursday. Yeah, I didn't get squat done since I left the house Saturday morning and haven't been back.
- Busy week ahead (as if we ever have a slow week). I have to work lots but also have to pick my kids up on time this week and will have a crappy drive to work this morning and will get started late. Not sure how I'm gonna make anyone, let alone everyone happy this week.
- My inlaws didn't make it here yet